Saturday, September 15, 2007

In My Dreams

I'm never going to be that person
That everyone's drawn to
I'm the one that sits in the corner and waits for you to ask a question
Then my heart is yours

I'm never going to be that person
That you think of first when you want a leader
I'm not the driving force in a group
I'm the one who follows willingly but wishes to be acknowledged

I want to be the one you think of first
I want to be the one you want to get close to, know more about
But I put myself second, why shouldn't you
I wear my heart on my sleeve, what else is there to know

Who am I, if none of these are me
And why do I pine after qualities I do not own
I want to be me, I want to be here
But I want to be more than that, more than me

But I don't feel real - solid
The possibility of breaking apart and evaporating seems inevitable
What is to be done when I'm in this place
When no one is innocent and all of us are lost

When all I want to do is stay in my dreams because
There it doesn't matter
There it's all different
There I am everyone and no one at the same time

Sunday, September 9, 2007

At the Core

The fire that glows
Wipes me clean
Leaving nothing but
What can't be seen

I call out to You
Salvation please
Reached out arms
Heart unfreeze

Another day, another test
One more will rip my chest
Sew it together, don't know if I can
Someone else must do it again

Take all the pieces
Every little last one
Giving them all to You
It should - has to be done

You come closer
To enact repair
My heart explodes
Feeling Your care

Only You can help me
Make my heart beat once more
Make it beat for You and You only
Only way possible, for You are its core

Wednesday, September 5, 2007

I Am

I am not the genius
The one you go to for help with school
The one has always has the answer

I am not miss popular
The one you hang around for
The one the guys wait on

I am not the center of attention
The one yelling the loudest
The one bringing the party

I am not the super athlete
The one who rocks any sport
The one who always wins

I am not the quiet one
The one who only speaks when spoken to
The one keeping her opinion and thoughts inside

I am not the rock
The one holding it all in
The one holding it all

I am afraid of being unwanted
But want everyone

I am the one who wants control
But has none at all

I am outspoken
But don't always say the right thing

I am wanting you to look at me
But don't want you to see my perfection or my imperfection

I am an emotional wreck
But want to hold it in

I am the one you forget
The one you neglect
The one loving you
The one asking for love in return
The one with all the questions
The one without answers
The one trying to understand
The one who won't let go

I am what God made me

Whoever that is